Someday, perhaps I will edit and post more photos of Rome. Maybe I will even take some new photos.
I just may do it this weekend-while-I-will-not-be-in-Chicago! But probably not, because I'll be so consumed with not-being-in-Chicago, there will just be no time.
But rest assured that it is on my mind.
On Car Chases
Sometimes, when I'm on the highway, I like to imagine that men in other cars are flirting with me. I convince myself that it was love at first sight, and that's why he looked over with such meaning when I passed him, or why he passes me and then lets me pass him and then passes me. This is especially great when the guy is good looking. It's also fun when I've got the music up and the windows down and the sun is perfect and I'm wearing sunglasses and lipstick, because then I just know it can't get any better than me, right then, speeding down the road in my little red car.
When I lose them or they lose me, I'm always a little disappointed. He could have been my soulmate!
PS: This photo is of me in my mum's car on the way to someplace. I miss my hair like that.
On Faithfulness
Today I made apple-butternut squash soup. It is delicious. But I was listening to the radio and a country song came on about being faithful. It got me thinking:
Faith is a noun that means complete trust or confidence, or a strong belief based on spiritual understanding rather than proof. Therefore, if being faithful means that you are full of faith, it means that you trust your partner explicitely, just because you believe in them.
But that means that if you're UNfaithful, it's because YOU have lost your trust for THEM, not the other way around. That makes sense. I have always felt that if you cheat on a relationship it casts doubt on everything that both of you do. If you have something to hide, who's to say your partner doesn't also have something to hide? And so if you are unfaithful, it truly means that you can no longer have complete trust in your relationship, that you have lost your faith.
I just thought it was an interesting way of looking at it.
photo by paulaferrary, on Flickr. Click the title above to link.
On Roaches!
So I had my first week at my feild placement. I'm there two days a week, and my first day just happened to fall on the day of the annual fund-raising golf tournament... so I spent my first day as a social work intern standing in pink metalic kitten-heels on the third fairway, handing out, and maybe partaking in, maybe not, I really can't say) jello shots and rummy-bears, selling raffle tickets, and informing the players of the closest to the pin competition. It was great. I now have a reputation as a pushy sales-woman.
My second day I nearly fell asleep in a two-hour staff meeting, but then I went on some home visits. At the first there were roaches. I was very good, I did not react. At the second there was a twenty-year-old drug addicted mother who looked at us with her big brown eyes and lied. I know, because I read her file. I kept thinking "you're my brother's age, you're so pretty. you're supposed to be in college, fighting with her boyfriend who's on the hockey team, having great make-up sex, getting good grades". I kept thinking "It's not even possible that you're fighting an addition, that you gave birth to a daughter nine months ago." That's exactly what I'm NOT supposed to be thinking.
I updated my faculty supervisor about my experiences. She said not to wear sweaters or coats into roach-infested homes because they might hitch a ride out with me and into my home. This really freaks me out. I immediately emptied my briefcase and shook it all out. No roaches. But still.
My second day I nearly fell asleep in a two-hour staff meeting, but then I went on some home visits. At the first there were roaches. I was very good, I did not react. At the second there was a twenty-year-old drug addicted mother who looked at us with her big brown eyes and lied. I know, because I read her file. I kept thinking "you're my brother's age, you're so pretty. you're supposed to be in college, fighting with her boyfriend who's on the hockey team, having great make-up sex, getting good grades". I kept thinking "It's not even possible that you're fighting an addition, that you gave birth to a daughter nine months ago." That's exactly what I'm NOT supposed to be thinking.
I updated my faculty supervisor about my experiences. She said not to wear sweaters or coats into roach-infested homes because they might hitch a ride out with me and into my home. This really freaks me out. I immediately emptied my briefcase and shook it all out. No roaches. But still.
On Growth
Things are so exciting and so full of possibility right now. This sort of growth doesn't feel like a snake shedding skin, or a hermit crab finding a new shell.
Rather, I feel like a tree. I'm growing sturdier and stronger. I'm reaching my roots down deeper, my branches up higher. I'm sprouting some new twigs.
Or better yet: In this growth, I feel like the young woman I am, continually embarking on the rest of my life.
On Summer Ending
Tomorrow is my first day of school. Wednesday is my first day back at work, and my second day of school.
To prepare I painted my nails. I got a facial, a haircut, a new bed, new bedding, a new mirror, a new roommate, a new apartment, and new school suplies. I finished my reports from Camp, and I just got the okay from my supervisor saying that they look good (this is a triumph for me!) and I'm done.
I'm excited! Bring on the fall!
To prepare I painted my nails. I got a facial, a haircut, a new bed, new bedding, a new mirror, a new roommate, a new apartment, and new school suplies. I finished my reports from Camp, and I just got the okay from my supervisor saying that they look good (this is a triumph for me!) and I'm done.
I'm excited! Bring on the fall!
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