Recap (or: When It Rains, It Pours)

Thursday - Rowena's birthday, much crying and no one noticed.
Friday - work w/o boss where one student is suspended, another comes unmedicated
Saturday - day spent on taxes and FAFSA
Sunday - Saturdays generally suck
Monday - end of rope at work
Tuesday - dear friend has brain tumor
Wednesday - Valentine's day, work being cancelled is no fun as am snowed in and alone, forget to let out neightbor's dogs
Thursday - car covered with ice, car won't start, step-grandmother has massive stroke and dies, left alone in house

Today I have to go to work for the last day before break, and that should be okay because we've got a fun schedule. I need to get my car fixed and take the dogs to the kennel and arrange for a trip to the airport on both ends and pack and clean the house so it's ready to be empty for a few days. Then I'm getting my hair dyed. I'm hoping that this trip will be filled with warm hugs and good friends and joy and wellness (but I'm a bit trepidatious).

and that's just the past week.

On Possibilities

Today is cold and silver and white. Work was cancelled, and I stayed indoors watching the weather swirl outside. Usually, I would savor a day like this. A day for hot chocolate and slippers and quiet.

But today I am aching for spring. I want the fresh green of new growth and open windows and the sounds of kids playing. I want music carried through bright air. I want to walk barefoot and to grin at the possibility of it all.


There don't seem to be many possibilities today.

If life were a movie...

...the lighting would always be perfect.
...everyone would be beautiful.
...if things went wrong, it would be only in the most perfect ways.
...seduction would be an option.
...we would do things with abandon.
...sex would be graceful.
...I would look pretty when I cry.
...love would be enough.
...everyone would be happy at the end.